A Second Look

It was a very uncomfortable situation. I was sitting across the table from the department manager, describing how it was becoming difficult to work with my boss. He challenged me to go again to have a conversation with my supervisor. I felt a knot grow at the bottom of my stomach. Fear was settling in and I realized that I felt intimidated.

Unfortunately, the feeling of intimidation had led my mind to play with thoughts that were not true of me. And playing with these thoughts led to decisions that were not the best for me or for the outcome of the situation. Fortunately, now that I could recognize the feeling I had something to work with.

First I refused to react any longer. Secondly, I talked to God about this feeling. He showed me how my reaction to intimidation contributed to the strained relationship. I had not expected my conversation with God to go this way. But He is a gentle Father desiring that all go well with me. I thanked God for showing me my part in the conflict.

When confronted with conflict, typically we think we are the victims of injustice or some wrong and in our hurt we become defensive. If not careful, our hearts get hardened. God’s gentle revelation to my contribution permitted me to take an offensive position in a positive manner. Clothed in humility, and admitting my part, I actually had a position of strength before my supervisor.

I have to thank my boss for causing me to take a second look. As leaders, we cannot offer all the answers, but we can re-direct others towards God. Though it is flattering to feel needed and sought out, the case needs to be re-directed to God. Pray together for the Holy Spirit to reveal the underlying issue. Our Father desires these conversations. It is not a burden for you to carry as a leader. You just know enough to point them to the true healer!

Don't be Stupid

Yep.


I said it.


Jesus said it in Matthew 7:26


"But if you just use my words in Bible studies and don't work them into your life, you are like a stupid carpenter who built his house on the sandy beach. When a storm rolled in and the waves came up, it collapsed like a house of cards."


When we gather together to study his words, he is there.  Jesus, the Word, is there among us.  And here's the thing, he is with us even when we're not gathered together to study his words.  


Jesus.


The Word.


Is living in us.


Wherever we go, whatever we are doing, he is with us.  If you don't already, begin talking with him throughout your day.  I would suggest using your "inside your head" voice when you're in public, but hey, that's your call.  The point is, the more aware of his presence we are, the more we are able to work his words into our lives.  Nothing is off limits, no detail is too small or unimportant.  Make him your go-to not your last resort.  


So let's be smart.



"These words I speak to you are not incidental additions to your life, homeowner improvements to your standard of living. They are foundational words, words to build a life on. If you work these words into your life, you are like a smart carpenter who built his house on solid rock. Rain poured down, the river flooded, a tornado hit—but nothing moved that house. It was fixed to the rock." Matt 7:24-25


What part of your life do you want to work his words into?

  

Follow to Lead, Lead to Follow

I’ve been thinking about leadership lately and recently we have been implementing and reinforcing some more requirements in higher levels of leadership at Bayside.  The interesting thing is often times we get some push back with people saying, “Why do I have to go through this course or why do I need to go to the retreat?  I’ve been in leadership for a long time and I’ve been a pastor before…etc.”  We have these requirements for a number of reasons:

1) Commitment – in order to be a leader, a certain level of commitment is required. 

2)  DNA – it’s important that our leaders understand the DNA of Bayside.

3) Servant Leadership – this is the one I would like to break down a little further.

For those of you who may not know me, I have a thing for ballroom dancing… I know, who would have thought?  In the movie, Take the Lead, Antonio Banderas’ character is a ballroom dance instructor.  In one scene, he is talking with all of the students’ parents and explaining the benefits of learning how to dance.  He uses an analogy of lead and follow.  If the woman can learn how to follow and trust, then the man can feel confident in leading.

What I take from this principle and apply it to us as leaders is that, we have to learn how to properly follow before we can effectively lead.  This is why we are called followers of Christ.  We are in this because we choose to follow Jesus and submit to His leadership and examples.  In that same way, leaders must learn to follow and trust leadership.  Only then can we properly lead others into being fully devoted followers of Christ.  So, in order to lead, you must first learn to follow.  As you lead, you are following the path that God has you on.

Ask yourself, do I have trouble submitting to leadership?  If so, ask God why. 

The Fragrance of Influence

Residing in each one of us is something so powerful that it can shape the destiny of our lives as well as the lives of others.  That something is influence.  Influence as a noun means an effect of one person or thing on another, and as a verb it means to persuade or induce. 

While everyone has influence, women wield their influence differently than men.  A woman has influence with her husband. Perhaps this is why the enemy targeted Eve. He knew she had influence. It is in our DNA to use our influence to connect, network, and gather people together. Twitter and Facebook have nothing on us! We seek to give to others and find joy in advancing a cause. That is why there are more women leading non-profits than men.  Christ-followers live our lives to advance the cause of Christ in our families, the market place, communities and in ministry.

We can wield influence for good or for bad. Take Herodias in Mark 6.  Not only was she married to Herod but also to his brother, Phillip. John the Baptist told Herod it was not lawful for him to be married to his brother’s wife so Herodias held a grudge against John and wanted him executed but she had no power to get this accomplished. However, she did have influence over her daughter who eventually asked Herod for John’s head, and Herod had him executed. Just think what could have happened had Herodias been under the influence of Heaven!

Influence is like a fragrance – it lingers when we pass by. What does our fragrance leave: bitterness, envy, strife, and anger?  Or does it leave peace, joy, grace, and mercy?  What fragrance are we carrying into our kitchens, our work place, and churches?  By cultivating a relationship with Jesus through reading the Word, praying, and staying in fellowship, we can ensure a life-giving fragrance as we seek to influence others for Christ.

Spend Your Inheritance

Obama is right, only not in this world. (please forgive me for the political spin). 


It is in the confines of the Kingdom of heaven that an inheritance spent lays up treasure in heaven. We are all called to spend the riches of heaven in this earth,  it is a travesty to leave them sitting in the bank. 

Every promise and miracle in scripture comes with the spendable power of do it again. Every testimony of God's power has a blank inserted for the next name to be filled in. A spendable inheritance and the chain of testimony is the vehicle from what God has done to what He will do. This is where we are called to reside. We can  focus on divine intervention and we can live beyond our means. The means of the humanly possible. 

I have given thought and have chosen not to think of the things not done for they are only the basis of disappointment and foundation of not expecting anything. They are the trap to thinking less of God and failing to live within the inheritance of the kingdom. Do we build the chain of testimony or do we build the chain of lack?  And do we let our fear of excess leave us standing in lack?   Let our trust be ruthless, for regret is more often based on what we don't do and action we didn't take. 

Every Christian starts with a deposit of the miraculous, the experience of Salvation. 

Our hearts are the place where we string together every good thing and every intervention, we can only build on the miraculous with the with the blocks of supernatural expectancy, faith.  All of God's promises are yes in Christ, (2 Cor. 1:20) it is the inner vault of intimacy where our inheritance is to be spent. 


Spend away!  It will result in treasures in heaven.  A treasure of lives impacted and potential unlocked. 


What are you going to spend today?  Tell us in the comments below.

Remembering Summer

As we are all rolling into a busy fall, I want to take a moment and celebrate some summer memories....

What a summer we had in Women's Small Groups!

We spoke His Peace, Breakthroughs & Heart's Made Whole, every single day, over each woman in Small Groups this summer and our Daddy in Heaven MOVED.

Relationships were healed


Families were reunited


Bodies were healed


Children were saved


Hurts were mended 


...and we all stepped closer into His beautiful embrace.


Hallelujah!


We got together to celebrate and have a little old-fashioned fun in the park in August.  Here's a peak:

This is one of our beloved Lead Coaches, Julia Mateer, showing us what she's got in the ultra competitive sport of watermelon seed spitting.

Julia proved to be an amazing seed spitter, but it was Coach Marilyn Hayden that took the trophy:

Marilyn Hayden and her Big Trophy

 Mary, Bonnie & Cindy, 3 beautiful hearts for women

Diana, a new group leader & Suzette a new coach, amazing women! 

 Krista & Kathy, they are both stepping up to lead this Fall!

Julia & Dale, Two of our fabulous Lead Coaches

What is your Small Group Story?  We would love to hear it.  

The Big One That Got Away

God taught me a lesson on faith this summer.  We were vacationing in northern NH on Lake Winnipesauke.  My husband caught the fishing bug.  It started Tuesday afternoon when he had a big large mouth bass on his line that got away.  It snapped the line and swam off with his hook in it’s mouth.

On Wednesday, he asked our 6 year old daughter Chloe to pray that he would catch a big fish.  Her prayer surprised us, “Dear God, please help Daddy catch the big fish that got away with the hook in it’s mouth, because that’s Daddy’s fish.”

Amazingly, one hour later he did just that!  He caught the same bass that had broken the line the day before, and it still had the hook and leader in it’s mouth!

Chloe prayed for that fish believing Chris would catch it! We could learn a lot by watching the faith of children.  They pray believing without doubt.  Then they go on playing or back to what they were doing without another thought about what they prayed for.  They don’t worry about the result!  They have trust that God will do what they prayed!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could pray like children?  All it takes is simple trust that our loving Father wants the best for His kids.  Let’s pray with faith believing that God will answer our prayer.  And not worry about the result.  Let’s pray believing we can catch the big one that got away!

by Bonnie McKinley

The Other Side of the Cross

To fall at the front of the cross, what a wonderful place, the lifting of the weight of sin the wonder of God's love, beyond comprehension our heart receives life and hope. We are his children in grace forever forgiven, made the righteousness of God in Christ. It is a work so thorough and complete what could it possibly lack?


Nothing.


That is the point. 


Why would we keep going back to a place that has provided everything for us to go on? 

The front side on the cross is the doorway to the other side, the side we are meant to reside on, live in and stay at, it is living on the other side of the cross. It is the very purpose that he brought us to Himself and paid such and incomprehensible price. And what honor is it to the Father and the gift of the Son to continually fall to the front on the cross never moving to other side, the place intended?

It is entering the palace, we are made royalty, our identity changed, our position with God forever transformed. 


Jesus said “I no longer call you servants I call you friends.” 


Who, invited into palace would be content to stand at the door and live as a servant and who being set free would still consider themselves a slave and never enter the gate of freedom to claim their identity?

Paul, being transported to heaven in body or out he did not know, saw inexpressible things that he was not permitted to tell. This so impacted his heart and out of it the prayer for the Ephesians 


“ I pray the the eyes of your heart would be enlightened that you would know the hope to which you are called. The glorious inheritance of the saints and the incredible great power for those of us who believe.”  


It is the resurrection power of the other side of the cross. We don't live in the tomb.  The stone has been rolled away and we are called the live as kids in the kingdom, exploring the treasure of the palace and calling out the treasure of those who are yet to join us. Can we truly save those who are bound if we don't first live in the freedom and identity we have received.  Can slaves lead slaves out of slavery? Or shall we just peer into the palace and never enter the  door to the other side. 


Jesus said “it is finished” 


Come on in. 


Change the world from the place of power!

Lay it Down

I woke up this morning feeling burdensome.  I prayed and it helped a little before I had to fly out the door for work.  I got to the tennis club and the burden stuck with me for majority of the morning.  Towards the end of morning practice, I went to talk to one of my students; she’s probably around 12 years of age.  I knew something was bothering her.  She then told me some of the other girls were aggravating her.  I told her, “you can choose to let this bother you or you can choose to let it go.”  I realize her emotions were taking control at the moment and she was upset.  Granted, she may have had a reason to be upset, but the choice was hers… whether she wanted to let it ruin her day or work past it. 

I was able to minister and help heed her emotions.  But the cool part of it for me was the aftermath of my own situation and burden I was carrying.  The very same counsel I gave her, I needed to listen to myself.  How often do we give advice to others, when we ourselves should be looking in the mirror?  I had a choice to make, I could let this burden weigh me down or I could give it to Jesus. 

Jesus says this in Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

The answer seems easy, right?  Easy to tell someone, but not always as easy when it pertains to us.  Again, so I’m faced with this choice… Do I let this burden bring me down or do I give it to the One who says, He’ll take all my fears, all my doubts and anything that could possibly be holding me back.  Psalm 55:22 says, “Cast your cares on the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous be shaken.”  The Lord is bound to His Word and He will never go back on it.  His character is true and just.  All we have to do is trust, because He will deliver and He will conquer!  There is no need to live in slavery when you are in Christ.  God is still in the business of setting the captives free!  Freedom awaits you… you choose.

Excellence, a working definition……

I’m not going to pretend I have the market cornered on defining excellence, but in the past 8 years I have developed a working definition I use on a daily basis to see if I am operating with excellence in the things that God has called me to do.

At the end of the day, I take a quick 2-3 minutes and get a bit introspective. I ask myself this question.  Did I do what I could/should, when I could, with what I had?  Let’s break that down a bit.

Did I do what I could/should?

We all get sidetracked and distracted from doing what we can/should do.  There are more things demanding our attention than ever before.  Focus is the key to this.  If we are honest with ourselves, the answer is pretty easy to come up with.

When I could?

Timing is everything.  If you have 24 hours is a day, then this applies to you.  This really comes down to knowing how to prioritize the things you get to do.  Another way to look at it is this, “The right thing done late is the wrong thing.”  Procrastinators should have a thoughtful look on their face and be saying, Oh yea……” to this.

With what I had?

I don’t have everything.  But we serve a God that does.  This piece of the question really comes down to being a good steward of what God has given us.  If everything I have is God’s in the first place, then I have every resource to do what he called me to do.

I have found this to be extremely encouraging over the years, keeping me focused on the vision God has for my life.

One final thought, if the answer to the questions we talked about is all too often “no” for you, don’t beat yourself up.  This is a process and no one starts off doing everything with excellence.  The awesome thing about this is if you had a rough day and excellence managed to elude you, don’t worry.  Tomorrow is a brand new day with opportunity to operate in excellence in all you do.

Question for discussion:  How do you define excellence?  Let’s talk about it in the comments section below…