A Second Look

It was a very uncomfortable situation. I was sitting across the table from the department manager, describing how it was becoming difficult to work with my boss. He challenged me to go again to have a conversation with my supervisor. I felt a knot grow at the bottom of my stomach. Fear was settling in and I realized that I felt intimidated.

Unfortunately, the feeling of intimidation had led my mind to play with thoughts that were not true of me. And playing with these thoughts led to decisions that were not the best for me or for the outcome of the situation. Fortunately, now that I could recognize the feeling I had something to work with.

First I refused to react any longer. Secondly, I talked to God about this feeling. He showed me how my reaction to intimidation contributed to the strained relationship. I had not expected my conversation with God to go this way. But He is a gentle Father desiring that all go well with me. I thanked God for showing me my part in the conflict.

When confronted with conflict, typically we think we are the victims of injustice or some wrong and in our hurt we become defensive. If not careful, our hearts get hardened. God’s gentle revelation to my contribution permitted me to take an offensive position in a positive manner. Clothed in humility, and admitting my part, I actually had a position of strength before my supervisor.

I have to thank my boss for causing me to take a second look. As leaders, we cannot offer all the answers, but we can re-direct others towards God. Though it is flattering to feel needed and sought out, the case needs to be re-directed to God. Pray together for the Holy Spirit to reveal the underlying issue. Our Father desires these conversations. It is not a burden for you to carry as a leader. You just know enough to point them to the true healer!